So this blogging thing. It's a LOT more complicated than I thought!
I have absolutely NO idea what I'm doing here. You know the saying "reaching in the dark"? [<-- is that even a phrase, or did I make that up?]. Yeah, well how about we rewrite that as "blindly jumping out of a plane" - I feel like that's a more accurate depiction.
I have no idea what I'm doing here. With this blog, or with life. When I was a little girl, I always imagined that by my mid-20s, I'd have this life thing down-pat. College degree in hand, amazing job that would be my permanent career, own my own place, know where I wanted my future to go, heck probably married or soon-to-be and ready to start a family soon.
Well, JOKE'S ON ME. Pretty sure none of those items are checked off, with the exception of a degree. And to be honest...I'm okay with that.
I'm ok with not being where the 6 year-old Emily imagined she would be right now. I'm ok with not being in a relationship when half my friends are getting engaged and/or having children. I'm ok that I'm still renting the same apartment I've rented for the last five years. I'm ok with the fact that I waited three years after graduating undergrad to go back to get my Masters'. A little uneasy not knowing where my future is headed? Sure. But all those "delays", all those points where I am seemingly "off-track" or went in an unexpected direction, are where they are for good reason. The 3-year gap between undergrad and grad school? I was regaining my health that had been in critical condition for the prior 12+ years. The lack of being tied down to an apartment or a family? That has allowed me to travel to countless countries and states - a passion that younger me didn't even realize I had.
So while I don't know what I'm doing here with this blog, or with my life in general, I've slowly learned to become okay with the uncertainty that the future holds. I have no idea what I'm really doing here - I'm not ashamed to admit it! But I'll cut you in on a little secret I've started to realize: I'm pretty sure nobody does! We're all just jumping blindly out of planes and headfirst off of cliffs, hoping we make it out alive. So what do you say? Bend your knees and take your best jump here right along with me - it's ok to not know and to jump into the unknown full-force. That's where the adventure begins!
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